Life's Annoyances

Wait, can this be real? Is this two posts on this blog in the same week? Back to back? Wow. That is quite impressive. Today went better than yesterday, as I have not broken anything...yet. The only frustrations I have experienced today pertained to the heat, as it was nearing triple digits by 10 this morning. This made our morning walks a little sticky and I made sure all of the pups were doing alright. Three of our dogs get about a mile walk, with our oldest pup doing between ½ to ¾ of a mile, at a slower pace. Didn’t run into any dogs off leash, which was nice. I wish that people would think about the impact that they have on the lives of others, including the lives of animals.

This leads into my view on my diet. I went gluten-free at the suggestion of my primary care provider when we were discussing my psoriasis and IBS symptoms. That was about two years ago and I haven’t had any gluten-containing products and I have noticed a change in my health. At the beginning of this year, I went vegan. This wasn’t a new thing for me, as I went lacto-ovo vegetarian in my teens and remained one for over a decade. However, this year was the first time I went completely vegan. I like knowing that my choices don’t cause the deaths of others, especially since I am an animal lover who has five dogs and a newly acquired rescue turtle name Harold.

The only real annoyances that I have experienced today was the washing machine a few minutes ago. It has a tendency to “walk” during the spin cycle. I adjusted the levelling feet, again, and after yelling, “Fucking piece of shit. Why don’t you fucking work?!” I ran it through a spin cycle, after removing the sopping wet towels. The cycle completed fine and I put the wet towels back in and, it appears that my words of encouragement worked. When I buy something, I expect it to work. When it doesn’t, it really annoys me to the point of lashing out in physical violence, but never at living things, but rather at the washing machine or heavy bag.

I really think the heat has something to do with my general level of annoyance, as there is no way to escape the heat. Sure, inside it is relatively comfortable since we have the swamp cooler Master Cool going, but using it makes me think of all the money that will be going to the utility company for the water and electricity that makes it run. However, it is currently 105℉, which is quite far from my personal comfort temperature of 70℉. In the winter, you can put clothes on if you are cold. However, in the summer, at least here in the desert, there’s nothing you can really do to escape the heat. I enjoy spending time outside, but not in this weather!

Work can be annoying too, especially when clients don’t really know what they want and they expect me to basically pull information out of my butt. Sorry, it doesn’t work that way. Only one thing comes out of there, and it’s not data. I have a couple of work projects that I picked up today, which is nice, considering I am saving up to buy a new phone to replace the one that I broke yesterday. I also have a few personal projects in the work that really need my attention. Lots of things, only one me.

Upon writing out the annoyances, I realized that many of them are out of my control, such as dogs off leash, the temperature in the MF’ing desert (don’t worry, we are working on moving in the next year or two), and the ineptitude of some clients. If I just accept that I don’t have the power or responsibility to change them, along with a few deep breaths, it will all be OK. Hopefully.

How do you deal with minor or major annoyances? Any tips? If so, feel free to leave them in the comments. It might help me or others learn how to cope with these irritations in life.

See you tomorrow*

*most likely, but no promises

Not a Willy Nilly Girl

I am not, nor from what I can recall having ever been, a willy-nilly sort of a person. Research is my friend and I try to gather as much information as I can before making any large (and sometimes small) decisions. It can be purchases such as when I bought my previous car, I examined the fuel efficiency, the cost of estimated maintenance, durability, resale value, and which features I wanted and which dealership carried what I wanted. I also research before buying televisions, booking hotels (price comparisons and reviews on various sites), and even the very Chromebook model that I am currently writing this blog post on...basically, I research EVERYTHING. Heck, it makes sense that it is part of my job too, since I actually enjoy it. I also researched the best environmentally friendly homemade laundry detergent since we use the gray water from the washing machine to water a section of our backyard. I even researched the best homemade dog treats (which I now do once a week instead of store bought since the dogs had some unpleasant reactions after they had some Milkbones the last time.

            So, it shouldn’t surprise anyone that I also do my research when it comes to moving and living in various states. Fortunately, the nature of my military background required me to live along the coast, and as a San Francisco Bay Area native, that never bothered me one iota. Sure, I have been stationed in some places that I was not too fond of for one reason or another (basically anywhere on the East Coast...sorry, just not my preference), but I was able to make do, knowing that I wouldn’t be there forever. I have lived up and down both the East and West Coasts, and traveled to close to two dozen foreign countries. None of that prepared me for where I am currently living though.

            While I conduct background research on 99% of the choices I make, I moved to Texas to follow my heart. Good thing he’s worth it, because I am not fond of this state. When filling out my “dream sheet” (basically requesting where I want to be stationed based on the openings and my rate/rank), I researched the areas where the billets were located. I know what I like and what’s important for me to feel comfortable. None of those things are located here in Texas (or at least not in the area where I live). Some of the things that I like to know about a place to help me in making decisions on where to live include:

●       Temperature

●       Outdoor activities

●       Political atmosphere

●       Eco-consciousness

●       Cost of living

See, I don’t think that is too much to consider when thinking about where to live. All of those things are important to me and can help me to thrive if given the right conditions. For temperatures, growing up in NorCal, it was rare when it hit 100 degrees, and when it started to get warm, say around 80 degrees, at least there was a cool breeze coming in from the San Francisco Bay and you knew that Mother Nature’s air conditioning (a nice thick layer of fog) would roll in. Here in Texas, a few days before summer “officially” began, we had already experienced a week of 90+ degree temperatures and broke the triple digit barrier. This week we are expected to be over 100 degrees for a few days at least, which makes me not so happy. You see, the heat makes me irritable. Sure, you think it makes you irritable, but it’s a little more intense for me, as it gives me both headaches and stomach aches. My eyes are photophobic, so the glaring sun doesn’t help much and my ethnic background is basically all of the pale cultures that you can think of...which makes me Casper the Friendly Ghost white and I burn very easily. I also don’t like the feel of the heat from the sun on my skin...so Texas is splendid for me. Can you feel the sarcasm as it drenches you, akin to the beads of sweat that form on your brow, the drops that trickle down your back, ending their journey in your butt crack?

            This brings me to the outdoor part. I lived in Oregon before I moved to Texas, and at least once a week, the dogs and I would go hiking in the forest and nature preserves (Oregon is kind of known for their trees). It was both a good workout (I would wear a weight vest, usually adding an extra 20-30 pounds for our 5-6 mile hikes). During the summer or warmer days, we just went a little earlier in the day, beating the sun and then making it home to sit in front of a fan or open up the windows for a breeze. Nature is and has been a large part of my life. Sure, nature is everywhere, even here, but it’s not the kind of nature I enjoy. I nearly cried the other day because of the fact that I miss trees. Not just the trees themselves, but missed what they represented. You see, I work as a freelance writer and am a full-time graduate student, which means I work from home, on my own schedule. I enjoy the freedom my work allows and I used to use that flexibility in my day to do things that would recharge my mind, such as hiking in the woods with the dogs. I have built my reputation in the writing world and have worked up the ranks to a point where I can earn close to what I used to make as a direct care provider, without clients physically assaulting me or making credible death threats. I now have a little more spare time, since I am making more per page. In the past, such an increase would allow me to spend more time outside, however, here in Texas, I despise the idea of going outside in the heat. Also, there are no forests to wander around and get lost as I recharge. The closest hiking trail to where we live is a sand dune. I kid you not. A. Sand. Dune. That just doesn’t cut it for me. There are a few trees here and there, but NOTHING like what I am used to, nor prefer.

            Okay, now let’s talk about politics. They say polite people don’t talk about death nor politics...but who's to say I’m polite? Back to my roots...I grew up in a liberal family, where differences were accepted and most of my family are registered democrats. Also, the Bay Area is a rather liberal location too, which I am very fortunate to have experienced. I have brought that with me wherever I have lived, as it is part of who I am; like the saying goes…”You can take the girl out of California, but you can’t get rid of the hippie.” Well, maybe I made that up...but regardless, it’s fairly accurate. I have found myself thrust into a land, akin to the Twilight Zone mixed with a zoo. I was aware that places like this existed, but I had never experienced it for myself. I hear that other places in the state are more progressive and liberal, but that is not the case where we live. I am used to being the outcast and outlier of society; this is a bit more extreme. I have found myself living among staunch gun-toting, liberal hating, proud to be oilfield trash republicans who have little tolerance for people who may think differently. I have been told that I don’t belong here since I am not a fan of guns in restaurants and because I don’t think that prayers belong in a public school. I try to understand the thought processes of others, but I just go mad when I try to apply logic to the residents in this area.

            So...yeah. I am planning my escape from this hell hole that is West Texas. We should be sprung from here in less than two years and I am already planning on where we need to move that can tick all of my boxes and allow us to be a happy couple. I feel bad that I am crabby at times due to my location, as that is not entirely his fault (aside from the fact that he grew up in the state). I know what it takes to recharge my mind and body...and Texas just doesn’t have it. So residents of Washington...I may be coming for you soon. Watch out and get out of my way...I think there are trees I need to hug.

Relationships

While on the surface relationships look the same

The only thing different being the name

Differences exist and are often quite great

There is no such thing as fate

Being separated from others in the past provided a relief

But this one is different, that is my belief

Being away from my dear

Has made things quite clear

We are not who we were years ago

And I am looking forward to having ring seats at the show

Missing Limbs Thrown at Classmates

So, here I am, sitting in a hotel room in Florida. I feel like I have left a limb in Texas and dread the idea of sleeping alone. Not even a dog for company. I am on the brink of tears, missing someone who I didn't even knew existed six months ago, yet here I feel lost without that familiar lump in the bed or arms surrounding me in the now familiar hug. The smell, the touch, the person. Who would have thought?

Tomorrow marks the beginning of my hell week, also known as residency. I checked in earlier today, setting my eyes upon my classmates for the first time...the same ones whom I have made jerk off motions to while reading their discussion posts online. So, that being said, this week should be interesting.

I have been reminded that I am not allowed to inflict bodily harm OR mental anguish upon my classmates. I foresee sitting on my hands and biting my tongue...better than the other way around I suppose, as my hands are already prone to bleeding. I suppose the fact that I am not staying in the same hotel as my classmates is helpful, as the school arranged a "reduced" rate at the 4-star hotel, which, for the whole week would cost over $1000...absolutely asinine. Instead, I found a hotel about 15 minutes away that has a kitchen in the room, which will allow me to eat healthier and save money. After all, I am a frugal graduate student.

There may be some updates and a lot of tweets, as my usual support system is not here with me :(

Steady in a Centrifuge

Yes, it has been a while since my last blog post, but life has a funny way of taking up time. Well, if it wasn't taking up time, I'd be dead. If by such a theory, then if life didn't take up time, am I writing this from beyond the living realm? Perhaps.

School is starting back up this week, and I find myself surrounded by nitwits...again. I often think I am a magnet for such individuals. I also have to attend a residency later this month, which will be a challenge. Not the topic, but rather the interaction I will be required to do with such twats. At least it will be more tolerable, as I have a reason to resist killing or flogging my classmates (or at least to be crafty enough to not get caught).

I made the trek successfully from Oregon to Texas, and am settling in nicely. I have never felt so supported, understood, and appreciated as I do here, which I feel fortunate (and sometimes not worthy). We have our happy, albeit dysfunctional, dog family, who aside from the occasional barking match, get along well. 

Work is picking up again, as just this week alone I have five projects due. It's nice to get back into my routine, as that is how I thrive the most. Some are able to tap into their creativity anywhere and anytime, but that is not my style. In order to write, I need a clear desk, some good audio entertainment to please my ears and stimulate my brain (usually BBC Radio 4, music, or even a Greg Proops podcast...aka "Proopcast"). Some good coffee and a snack are good additions too. By "good coffee," I don't mean some overpriced, over-commercialized trendy brew, but rather a quality bean, freshly ground, and brewed at home in my French press. It is so much better than drip coffee, and not as pretentious as "Starfucks."

Sometimes I think I am just going to school to obtain a piece of paper that will give my writing more credence, as I am not really a "people person," and have zero tolerance for potential clients who either complain about piddly crap or are stuck in the victim role (and happy there). I may be too harsh of a counselor for some clients.

Okay, back to work. Oh, and for any freelance writers out there in the blogosphere, I can recommend the Samsung Chromebook. While I still need to keep my old laptop for a few things (Grammar checking, language translation, and printing), it works well for my needs. It works fast, doesn't make my hands sweat by the heat that accompanies most laptops, and I don't have to worry about losing my work.