Thoughts and Prayers

Almost without fail, in the aftermath of tragedies 
such as what happened just hours ago in Paris, media outlets and various social media venues become overflowing with people uttering the statement, “Our thoughts and prayers are for (insert tragedy here).” Is prayer a magical thing that makes all of the pain and hurt go away? Are thoughts as effective as actions? The answer to these questions is a resounding NO. Sure, they sound good. In a society that thrives on feeling like they are doing something without expending any effort, it makes sense that such sentiments would come pouring out of mouths and keyboards around the world. But wait a minute. If we state that our thoughts and prayers go out to the victims of such tragedies, shouldn’t there be more peace and less bloodshed in the world? 

From a scientific approach, you would expect to see the rates of terrorism and mass shootings to go down with all of the thoughts and prayers that go spinning through the cosmos after such incidents if thoughts and prayers were effective. However, this does not seem to be the case. Ergo, one could conclude that thoughts and prayers are not effective at reducing the number of lives lost due to mass shootings or acts of terrorism. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t pray for the victims and survivors of such events, as that would be me imposing my beliefs upon another. However, what I am saying is that prayer is like masturbation...it feels good for the person doing it, but it does nothing for others. 

Bang. Bang. We should be ashamed.

Today, we had two shootings (as of noon) at college campuses, which makes it three shootings over the past seven days. The politicians who are jockeying for position of leader of this country keep spewing rhetoric, without focusing on the issue. Some have come out in favor of looser restrictions on guns, while others point a finger at mental health issues. Sadly, the majority is misinformed, surrounded by sycophants who wouldn’t dare go against what the major funders would approve of, regardless of the logic behind such ideas. Talking heads who worry more about when their coffer will begin to overflow and saying the most inflammatory comments on a national platform, only with concerns of causing waves to drown the public in circular logic.

We have had close to 50 mass shootings this year alone, which, according to the Federal Bureau of Investigations (FBI), a mass shooting is when four or more individuals have been shot during a single event without a cooling off period (FBI Reference). So, I guess by that definition, the shootings that occurred today may not have met the criteria due to the number of individuals injured in the events, but would we be any more alarmed if there were more people injured and/or killed in such instances? If so, what does that say about us? 

I’m not going to pretend that I have an answer to such a complex problem. It’s easy to blame others, blame the guns, blame mental illness, rather than looking in the mirror as a society, seeing the monsters that we have created. We have lost much of the respect and empathy necessary for living in society, widening the space between “us” and “them,” when in reality, we are all humans. Yes, even those who have committed such atrocities, they too are human. We are a product of both nature and nurture, and the latter may need to be examined in regards to how we behave in public.

Looking at the profiles of those who have committed such attacks, there is an underlying trend that begins to arise. Many have cited in their manifestos that they feel as if they had been slighted and targeted by others in society, whether it be reprimanded for poor employment performance or being turned down for dates from the opposite sex, there appears to be an unjust sense of entitlement and an inability to behave like civilized adults, using cognitive reasoning skills rather than resorting to the use of a weapon. 

Could some of this be due to a coddled generation? Perhaps kids being told that they’re wonderful, talented, and special, without actually performing to such standards? When confronted with views other than those held by such individuals, they don’t have the tools needed to handle differing ideas, violence outbursts are the result. Does this sound like a mental illness that many politicians keep pointing fingers at for the cause of mass shootings, or does it resemble the type of behavior that is applauded in politics, substituting the use of rhetoric that is based on lies, often shouted at deafening levels?

Fecking Residency AGAIN!

I had to write a little "About Me" introduction to my course professor and my fellow classmates in my online MS course, which includes two residencies, which I dread. I think most of it is the "having to spend time with people" part that I dread, especially since for the past two plus years, I have been reading their online posts, rolling my eyes and making the jerking off motion with my hand. I think that is frowned upon when interacting with them in person, especially as my MS degree is in mental health counseling. I think I will keep my hair blue though, despite the fact that last time I attended residency, I was "talked to" about it not being professional. I will also be wearing my Chucks instead of the traditional high heels or whatever the current fashion trend is for women. I will also be wearing pants. Real peoples' pants. I think my distaste for traditional rules and regulations can be gleaned from the below introduction I wrote. I wonder what my classmates will think...

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I will be attending the residency experience next month in Dallas. My boyfriend and I recently (a few months ago) moved FROM Texas to New Mexico and I was hoping that I wouldn't have to return to that state, especially not this soon. I kid. Sort of. So, a little about myself, I guess. I am originally from the San Francisco Bay Area, and due to my 12 years of active duty military service, I have lived up and down both coasts. I admit, I do miss being by the ocean. One day we'll get there again. I earned my BS degree from Oregon State University (beautiful campus by the way) in 2011 and worked for a bit in a few group homes, working with a variety of clients. In one house, I worked with adolescent individuals who had developmental delays and were registered sex offenders, and in a different house (with a different company), I worked with clients who had developmental delays with comorbid mental illnesses. I worked my way up to the House Manager, when I had to leave due to a client making threats to kill me (to his counselor...can we say YAY for the Tarasoff law?) and then attempted to carry out his threat when my boss insisted on me working with this client on a 1:1 basis.

Due to that incident, I found my current job, which is a freelance writer. I have achieved the honor of being published, with most of my work being nursing or mental health research related. I enjoy my job, but I know that in order to fulfill the requirements for my MS degree, I will have to work outside of the house in order to obtain my necessary experience hours. Unlike many of the classmates who I have encountered in my numerous courses at Capella University, my goal is not to become a counselor, but rather use it as a stepping stone towards my PhD in psychology, as my heart belongs to research.

I guess one of my apprehensions as I begin this course is that I will be driving to Texas. That wouldn't usually be an issue, but about three weeks ago, I was involved in a serious accident that ended up totaling the vehicle I was driving. I've driven around a little since the accident, but not the 16 hours it will take to get to Dallas. I look at is as exposure therapy. The other challenge I foresee is having to wear "real people" clothes. Since I work from home and live in New Mexico, pants don't happen often. In regards to course-related challenges, I identify with the CBT model of counseling and may need to work on my person-centered skills to excel during the residency portion.

See you guys next month (I'll be wearing pants, I swear)!