Uprooting and Stress: Is There a Better Way?

Imagine this with explosive diarrhea

     

Nature's Pain Relief

       Dude. I don’t even know where to start. It has been such a whirlwind and at times it feels as if I am barely hanging on, fingers about to slip into the swirling vortex of stress, anxiety, and, at times, depression. Fun times, right? Let’s not forget about the physical effects of this emotional turmoil, as I live with fibromyalgia and small fiber neuropathy, which can be aggravated by stress. Good thing I am not stressed, right? Oh, and diverticulitis and IBS are also affected by stress, so we’re over here playing naked Twister, trying not to soil ourselves. Great visual, right?            

So, how did we get here? Trees and heat. Seriously. See, I am not a fan of the heat and grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area, where the use of air conditioners was not something that was common, as the fog would often roll in, working as Mother Nature’s air conditioning. I currently live in the desert. Sure, there are some trees, but nothing like I lived among in the Pacific Northwest, where I was living prior to moving to Texas, then New Mexico. Fortunately, I work from home, so as long as I have an internet connection and WiFi, I’m good. Well, my boyfriend has been putting in for jobs with his company in various states, but all of which had cooler weather and either medicinal or recreational marijuana. Those were our main criteria.

Animals are friends for life. Not disposable. Not ours to eat or breed.

            Fast forward a few months and DING-DING-DING, we are bound for Durango, Colorado. Oh, and his supervisor wants him there in about two weeks. TWO WEEKS. TWO. MOTHERFUCKING. WEEKS. Not a problem. Let’s just work on finding a place, packing up all of our belongings, including our dogs, a turtle, and fish (because we are not the kind of people who put dogs up on Craigslist for “free” because they are moving to a new place that doesn’t allow pets), and move to another state in two weeks. Simple, right? Fuck.

            So, in order to ensure that we are not homeless once we arrive in Durango, we took a trip up there. Leaving a little before 5am and getting back after 10pm, it was a long day. But, we met with a realtor who showed us a place that we had been talking with the current tenant and landlord. Everything was going well until Monday morning, today, when I received an email from the current tenant, who stated that the landlord was not satisfied with our background check (namely my credit report), and as such, we would not be considered further for the house that we wanted to rent. Hopes? Dashed to smithereens. My heart sank.

Guaranteed to make you feel sexy as hell

            Perhaps my mood to hearing that we wouldn’t be able to rent the house we looked at was intensified due to an event that occurred earlier in the day. I have been having terrible post nasal drip for the past few months. It got to the point where I physically collapsed several times, hitting my head on a hard surface a few times due to becoming very lightheaded while trying to clear my throat of stuff that can only be described as having the consistency of cold molasses. I finally conceded to go to our local VA health clinic, where they gave me a shot of an anti inflammatory and prescriptions to the EXACT SAME FUCKING THING I HAD BEEN TAKING. Same dose. They then told me to come back into the clinic within the following week if I am not feeling better.

Not so Breaking News

Well, I am not feeling better, so I went back to the VA clinic this morning, prior to hearing the news about the place. Good thing too, as I would have probably been placed on a 5150 hold and unable to do the things I need to do in regards to the move, school, and work. After filling out the triage form, I took a seat and waited to be called back to be seen. That would not happen today, as a nurse (?) called me up to the window and told me that they can’t see me anymore since I had been referred out via the Choice program and had a civilian primary care provider now. Well, I saw that person once, for about five minutes, and she didn’t listen to me at all during that time. I was also told the previous week to return to the clinic location if I wasn’t feeling better. See the frustration?

Not actual house

So, we’re back to square one, looking for a place to live, while residing in a different state, seven hours away. We have expanded our search radius. I didn’t want to, as it snows there and my boyfriend will have to drive in the snow, which is why I wanted to be relatively close to his work, which is in Durango. We will be filling out more applications. One place looks like a murder house, but it’ll do for now, as the owner will be fixing it up more come the warmer months and then put it up for rent for a much higher price I presume.

You can donate by hitting the word PayPal

I am not one to ask for help lightly. I often pride myself on my ability to do things all by myself. However, I am not sure I will be able to maintain my sanity without a little help. I have been diagnosed with a number of chronic pain conditions, which are intensified by stress. I am trying to keep myself together, as the next month will be very stressful. If possible, if you feel so inclined, I have set up a link via PayPal if you would like to help me to maintain some sanity while we go through this stressful time. My boyfriend’s company isn’t providing any relocation assistance, so it’s just us, our savings, and rescues. After we get settled in the new place, wherever that may be, I will be working on my mental and physical health, finishing up my last course towards my MS degree in Clinical Psychology with a specialization in Applied Research, and hopefully able to breathe once again.

Thank you for reading and feel free to share this post with others 😀 

First World Problem, But it Sucks!

Okay, so I know that this may come across as one of those “First World Problems” such as getting the wrong order at Starfucks or getting your earbud cord tangled. However, that being said, today’s issue has led to a severe impact in my daily life. This morning as I was walking one of our dogs, an untethered dog came running towards us. In an effort to protect my dog from the loose one, my phone fell out of my pocket. So, let me preface this with the fact that I have never cracked a screen on a phone or tablet. However, this morning, when I picked up my phone after it falling, face down, of course, I noticed it had two cracks. Fuck. Even more fuck? The touch screen stopped working. I could see that I had notifications, but I was unable to respond to them.

This is where this issue turns from a “First World Problem” to a real problem. As a freelance writer and a remote employee for my university’s library system, I rely on my phone as a way to maintain communication with my clients and the professors who I assist as the library resource assistant. Without being able to communicate with them, it can cost me jobs, which, in turn, can affect my daily living abilities.

I have had this phone since 2015, so it has been with me a while. Luckily, my boyfriend was able to lend me his phone while we purchased him a $35 phone to use for the time being. As a graduate student and freelance writer, my income varies. Having to come up with money to buy a new phone, pay bills, rent, food for us and the dogs, utilities...it all adds up. It also sucks that I have to pay close to $350 this month to my school since they changed the drop deadline when I was enrolled in a course I wasn’t required to take and another fee when I had to reschedule my residency week due to poor health (fibromyalgia can be unpredictable). So, while I have the money, I don’t really have it.

I really like the Moto interface and the accessibility options, particularly the approach feature that allows me to see my notifications without having to physically touch the phone. I know I am spoiled. I try that with my other electronics, but it doesn’t work (LOL). I don’t know. It’s just been a stressful day, which piggybacked on a stressful night, as some dolt was lighting off fireworks last night. It’s June. It’s illegal. It’s inconsiderate. Don’t be a dolt. I am already dreading the first week of July, as last year it was nearly intolerable with the fireworks shooting off, but that is for another post.

I think I will look for estimates to repair my 2015 Moto X Pure, as well as save up for the upcoming Moto X4, which should be released within the next month or two. I guess it is a good thing that my birthday is next month. Any money I receive will be going towards my school loans and a new phone. Not exactly what I wanted to happen, but at least there is a way to remedy the situation. The hardest part about breaking my phone was the fact that I am HORRIBLE at remembering things such as passwords and user IDs.

Hopefully tomorrow is better!